The Fixer: Rekindling The Desire To Thrive

Introduction:

Welcome my friend,

This Valentine weekend would have been very soothing to have a love themed discussion.

Yet, here we are, still caught up in a conversation that has carried over from last week.

It's for this reason then, that it'll be brief, mainly looking to wrap up a few things that would normally fit into one conversation; had it not been for last Friday's peculiarities on my end.

How are you doing, my friend?

It's the weekend of love, so if you have someone special, I hope you carve out a sweet, quiet moment with them.

Beyond that, also find simple ways to intentionally share warmth and kindness with the people around you, this weekend and always.

Cheers to a happy weekend!

Discussion:

In our previous conversation, we met the manager.

The one who has slowly lost sight of who they truly are, simply by getting by day after day, letting what was meant to be a temporary quick fix settle in and stretch far longer than it ever should have.

(More here: https://whereweareone.beehiiv.com/p/the-manager-the-impact-of-getting-by)

In other words, they’ve come to accept their survival mode as their default reality, having lived in it long enough that the memory of what thriving actually feels like has faded away.

This is the person that now quietly tolerates lifestyles, relationships, dreams, and even physical and health conditions that fall well short of their highest potential, because they’ve lost touch of what this once felt like, or could still become.

The good news though, is that this isn’t the end of it.

There's still a real opening for the manager to step in, fix what’s been neglected, and rekindle that deep desire to thrive once more, instead of merely scraping by.

This is the basis of today's conversation.

■ Understanding Our Loss Of Identity 

Settling for less demands a loss of identity because to fully embrace a diminished version of life, we must first forget or suppress who we truly are and what we’re capable of becoming.

Which is why the first step to recovery is to reclaim our identity.

Most of us have become disconnected from our inner child, the purest, most essential part of who we are at our core.

As a result, we now find ourselves numbly tolerating situations, behaviors, and compromises that would once have made us deeply uncomfortable.

We’ve lost touch with the version of ourselves that existed before life’s happenings arrived and quietly stripped away pieces of our voice, our aspirations, our dreams, and our inner strength.

We can no longer find that person who once hungered for more, believed they deserved more, and had the courage to reach for it.

The truth is, at the root of this loss of identity is the loss of hope itself.

When things have remained painful or stagnant for too long, we stop believing that they can ever truly improve.

Here, we quietly decide it’s safer and less painful to live without expectations at all, than to risk the repeated sting of having them unmet.

This is not a good place to be in.

■ Regaining Lost Identity 

When we’re living inside a suppressed identity, we usually don’t even realize it, which is exactly why we settle into it so comfortably.

Yet this is precisely what confuses and pains the people around us: the ones who still clearly remember who we once were.

So when those people gently try to remind us, to stir our awareness and call us back to ourselves, we don’t have to become defensive.

This open, non resistant mindset is what sets the right tone for real change.

From there, the focus shifts to actively seeking solutions, earnestly searching for practical ways to break free, having rightly become uncomfortable with where we now find ourselves.

What this looks like in practice is refusing to sit passively any longer; instead, getting up, stepping out, and making things happen.

This shift, from waiting to acting is the exact driving force we need.

■ The Work It Takes To Regain Our Identity 

For those of us who are believers, there’s often this strong tendency to hope for, or even expect, a sudden, miraculous turnaround that instantly flips our entire situation.

Yet that isn’t always how it happens, because genuine faith is most clearly shown through our readiness to do the actual work that’s required, and that work is, by nature, a process.

So while work without faith can lead to burnout, faith without work in itself is delusional, because what we're not actively changing we're choosing.

This means we must be ready to make real sacrifices, to assign ourselves hard tasks, to honestly question ourselves, and to push beyond what feels comfortable until we reach our true limits.

It means being intentional about stacking small, positive changes day after day, gradually rebuilding ourselves brick by brick until the structure of who we once were and can still become stands strong again.

Here, it's important to understand that the only shame is remaining in the same spot without doing anything, not going out there to try again.

So while many may want to mock us for where we're starting from, not much of them will show us any compassion, support or care if we continue staying stuck.

Summary:

When something is utterly broken we usually go out there and fix it but when it can be managed, it can be a trap.

Many times certain parts of us are broken but because we're doing well in another aspect, we think that we're fine but we're not.

True fulfillment is wholesome and complete, truly satisfying.

…and we don't have to settle for less.

Excellence and fulfillment are the casualties where abnormalities have been normalized.

This doesn't have to be so.

Master Apprentice.

www.x.com/truekingmaker