Rebuilt: The Progress In Falling Apart

Introduction:

Welcome my friend, 

The feeling of being here with you is always the same because I come to you with the same expectation every Friday; which is for us to have an impactful conversation. 

Through each of them, you've played your role of showing up for it which then places on me the responsibility not to keep you waiting.

It's in this sense of duty that I draw the strength to readily avail myself as a custodian by which these words come to you, putting every other commitment aside to be here at your service. 

This should be the same for all of us.

Beyond just earning a living we should appreciate and approach our jobs as an opportunity to serve others; and to do so diligently and cheerfully. 

When we do our jobs well, we provide solutions to the problems of others which is why we're also paid for it. 

It's in this that we find the relationship between laziness and lack which is why we're encouraged to be productive with our time as a way of creating a life of abundance. 

After all, when we think of it, being in lack may be a fair punishment for robbing others of the value of our services to them. 

Discussion: 

To rebuild is different from to build because it means that there is an already existing structure that is no longer considered suitable the way it is, and requires modification. 

For instance, we can decide to renovate our house because: it's become too old, we want to increase the size, redesign it, and so on. 

In the same way, we can wake up one day and all of a sudden feel this dissatisfaction with the life we've built because we genuinely know that we can be more.

Here, we become relentlessly disturbed by how little we've made out of our abilities, talents and gifts like a man that's built a small house on a large piece of land.

So we feel this need for expansion, to do more, to become more and to demand more out of life. 

If you're this person, then this conversation has come at the right time for you, as we shed light on what rebuilding our life entails. 

■ The Demolition 

Once we want more for ourselves, something happens that immediately collapses the life that we currently have.

It may be a big loss, a major setback, the end of a relationship, death of a loved one and so on, such that we're left completely broken and shattered as in a house that was demolished.

It's this broken state that makes us become receptive to the responsibilities of our rebuild as we're able to: 

▪︎ Pull Down Harmful Old Habits 

To rebuild ourselves will always require that we give up old habits that are no longer aligned with our new self. 

Building with mud isn't as solid as doing that with reinforced concrete which is why we have to adapt new disciplined habits that will keep us resistant to the pressures of our growth. 

▪︎ Break Meaningless Bonds 

The quality of a relationship is determined by the value it adds to us. 

It's difficult to break out of a lifestyle that we enjoy while still hanging out with those that are actively engaged in it. 

Separation is therefore crucial not out of spite but as a way of protecting ourselves from exposure to pleasures that are bad for us. 

▪︎ Lay Aside Our Ego

Pain, struggle, and helplessness teach us humility as we learn that nothing is really under our control and everything we've ever done was because of God. 

Adversity humbles us as we watch God pull  us out of situations we knew we never could have saved ourselves from. 

When all our good planning fails, we learn that the perfect plan is found in the humility of absolutely following God's will for our lives. 

▪︎ Give Up Old Dreams 

When we give up an old lifestyle to adapt to a new one, we give up on all the dreams we had of it. 

As we build a new life, we have to accept that some of the things we looked forward to doing are no longer suitable to our new self; so that we can begin to create new imaginations that align with who we've become. 

For instance, if as part of our rebuilding, we pull out from a corrupt establishment, we miss out on the promotions and positions we could have attained if we remained in it. 

This is the price of our growth. 

However, in the long run, we'd always benefit more from rebuilding ourselves than anything we pass up on.

■ Why We Resist A Rebuild 

The first challenge a rebuild faces is the existing structure itself which is why renovations involve some form of demolition as we've just discussed.

Yet because demolition involves tearing down and falling apart many of us resist it.

In doing that we've failed to acknowledge that when we shield ourselves from the pain of discomfort we consequently deny ourselves of the opportunities to expand. 

It takes discipline to break away from old habits some of which have even become addictions. 

However, discipline isn't a buzz word, it's an action, in fact a series of actions, overtime daily. 

To be disciplined is to be able to choose our long term goals over pleasures that temporarily satisfy. 

It also takes courage to rebuild. 

It's not easy walking away from relationships and old bonds, or jobs we've been doing for years, and everything we're used to, to walk into something we fear is “uncertain”.

This is why most of us are unwilling to rebuild. 

We want to hold on to what is already there, even if improving promises to be rewarding in the future. 

It therefore, takes a strong conviction in what we're doing, to be able to keep rebuilding in the face of our fears.

■ How To Approach Our Rebuild 

Having come short at building the life we we wanted the first time, we're encouraged to complete our rebuild in such a way that: 

▪︎ God Is Our Foundation 

To successfully rebuild our lives is to start living to please God. 

When the focal point of all we do is to obey his will and live the life of our purpose, we leave all the consequences to him, and boy, does he come through? 

When we build with God we receive the grace to make the right decisions because he teaches us discernment and sound judgement as we seek his face before making any moves. 

When we drop all our logic at his feet, our anxieties go away as we experience the blessing of self confidence, leaning totally on him by faith. 

This is how we lay a solid foundation for our rebuild. 

▪︎ We Build Around Our Gifts 

When we use our gifts to serve others we find fulfillment. 

When we build around areas of our strength, life ceases to be a struggle because we find satisfaction in our daily living. 

When we understand the responsibility of living for others, we learn to show up for them consistently without excuses. 

▪︎ We Build For Service Not Applause 

Many of us out of peer pressure had desperately made mistakes that damaged us, in a bid to impress others and gain their approval. 

When we live for applause, we live as though life is a performance where we constantly have to put up a good show for our audience.

This can be overwhelming. 

As we rebuild we find meaning in the depth of our good influence on others, not the size of our bank accounts. 

Summary:

At some point in a man's life he may have to accept the shame of defeat and then humbly and willingly build himself back up in solitude. 

Desperately trying his best to avoid the mistakes of his first downfall through discipline and excellence. 

This is the resilient man.

Master Apprentice.

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