Accountability: The Role I Play

Introduction: 

Welcome Buddy, 

From where I'm sitting, I can look directly at the sun if I raise my head, yet there's this tree behind me providing just enough shade to keep me comfortable. 

This is an expression of the simplicity and beauty of nature which allows us to enjoy serenity and tranquility away from all the hazards man has created for himself in the form of inventions and innovations. 

Yet, how can we have a dig at the same civilization that has given us this internet and the various media platforms with it, that have allowed us to connect and build this community from many miles apart?

So like nature, other factors have come together to ensure that we're having this conversation, with the most significant one being you, my friend, because once again on another Friday, you've availed your time.

Discussion: 

In our feature story today, we look into the relationship between two brothers where the younger brother had moved in with the older one. 

Everytime, when big bro's friends came around and made a mess, he just ignored them but would take a go at lil bro, blaming him for everything his own friends had done. 

This upset lil bro a lot because “Your own friend has just apologized for ruining something in your home, what have I got to do with it?” “How's that even my fault?” 

This whole time though, he had completely failed to realize that his brother expected him to take charge in his absence; to keep things in order because it was also his home.

He couldn't see that it was his “your friends, your home attitude” and refusal to take responsibility because “it's not my business” that made the other boys overly comfortable and destructive. 

In fact, it's this lack of accountability that annoyed his brother. 

■ Awakening To Our Responsibilities 

To be accountable is a quality that means that we're able to immediately look inward on how our actions and decisions can impact or have impacted a situation without looking to shift any of the responsibility to others.

Normally, our human nature makes us very much inclined to exonerate ourselves of the blame in every given situation, deliberately downplaying our role and influence on the outcome.

For instance, the majority of those that are dissatisfied with the reality of their lives are unwilling to shade harmful habits to adapt helpful new ones but will rant endlessly at their predicament. 

It's the same for those of us that have experienced first hand how certain government policies have affected our businesses and livelihood but disregard our role in getting these people into and keeping them in power. 

Individually and collectively as a society, we've created a system that stifles good men and rewards brutal men who's biggest strengths are clearly not empathy or the goodwill of their mob. 

The system is already compromised from the time we place certain undocumented but well known cultural limitations within an establishment such that people of certain race, colour or gender are unable to attain more than a given rank within it, regardless of their competence. 

Also, in severed relationships, we readily write a story where others are villains for how they treated us, even when it's very easy to spot our own consistent pattern of flawed behaviour that have showed up in these friendships. 

These are bad habits we've picked from the adults around us while growing up and some that we've developed as coping mechanisms in our trauma. 

What about making that comment in front of the manager that throws a colleague under the bus and then ‘helping ’ them with some points later on to fill their query? 

As we mature, we understand that complete accountability goes beyond merely looking after what has been entrusted into our care but in also acknowledging the destructive ripple effect that not stepping in to feel a void can create. 

■ What Happens When We Don't Take Charge 

When lil bro confronted his brother on why he made him take the blame rather than caution his friends, he explained to him that his friends would go, but he'd remain and that it's not “your house” but “our house”.

In this he became aware that his lack of accountability also meant that he has been: 

▪︎ Wasteful 

Our ability to use our time wisely is the most rewarding benefit of our accountability. 

Until we see our time as a resource and raw material, we'll remain unable to get a grip of it.

Until we're intentional about how we use it, we'd always say “it has flown by”.

As we schedule our time, it slows down because we're able to direct ourselves on carrying out activities as we have planned them.

▪︎ Selfish 

If you drove your car to the gate of your home and left it there, it's your spouse and other of your family that wouldn't drive out.

If you did same at the entrance of your office complex, it's the administrators, customers and everyone else needing to move in or out that'll be delayed. 

Yet, doing same on the road on a busy night wouldn't just cause traffic, but has the potential to cause accidents and consequently deaths. 

From this we understand that on different scales, our lack of accountability can cost others and it's selfish to do so. 

When an engineer does a bad job fixing the brakes or when the doctor makes a mistake, they may not have the same steep consequences as those made by the laundry man.

▪︎ Proud 

It takes humility to understand that we're our brother's keeper. 

In being bad stewards, we show that we consider ourselves above carrying out certain responsibilities because they're better reserved for those below our finanancial or social class. 

Yet we claim to learn from the master that washed the feet of his followers. 

▪︎ Limited 

Until we take responsibility of the role we play in our own misfortune we'll continue to blame everything but ourselves for our lack of significant progress.  

When we step up to take responsibility, we grow by expanding our limit. 

It's experience gained, problem solved and self confidence boosted. 

Summary: 

The babysitting dad understands that he's taking care of his child. 

So for him it's a duty that doesn't replace the others like providing his food, shelter and clothing; even protecting his mother.

Never be shy to step up and step in everytime you should. 

Master Apprentice.

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