Guilt: The Burden Of Regret

Introduction:

Welcome, my friend,

Our conversation today is deeply relatable because regret is something every one of us knows all too well.

Sometimes we walk away from a moment and instantly sense we could have handled it better, sparking a fleeting sadness we quickly push aside.

Yet other times, our choices lead to massive repercussions, blowing things so badly for others, ourselves or both.

Now, we carry that crushing burden of regret, tormented by the thought that things could have been different if only we had chosen otherwise.

This burden is far heavier than that brief sadness we dismiss.

This one is depleting and exhausting, and that's what guilt is about.

Simply put, it's an overpowering sense of regret for being responsible for actions that caused painful results.

Which makes it an unwelcome emotion to endure, prompting us to wonder how we can truly live with it, or better yet, recover from it.

Discussion:

There are three (3) key words in our subject line and we're going to use them as the guide to give our conversation a clear direction.

“We can't return to the past to change our actions but for it to rob us of the chance to act differently today, is a choice.”

Here, the words change, chance, and choice stand out, and we're going to explore them through the lens of this feeling of guilt we carry.

■ Guilt - Changing The Hands Of Time 

The very fact that we feel guilty is a sign of remorse.

It's an acknowledgment that we're not proud of what we did, because we know we: overreacted, have outgrown the information or beliefs that triggered us, or never intended to act that way, as in an accident.

Whatever the reason, we've accepted the impact of that outcome on ourselves and/or others, and we've taken full responsibility.

This accountability is healthy and essential, because it means that if we face a similar situation again, we'll handle it differently.

That, in itself, signals growth and lessons learned, even if it still hurts to have learned them this way.

Truth is, there are certain things that have happened in our lives that adversely changed everything for us, or for others, especially those we love most, so that the pain cuts deep.

This guilt eats us up, as we spend everyday living in the past, only wishing that there's a way we can turn the hands of time.

Yet, we can't.

We can't realistically undo yesterday's actions, and refusing to accept this is simply hitting pause on our lives while time marches on.

This may not be the wisest choice, since it robs us of the opportunity to grow and consequently denies those around us the chance to experience a better version of us.

Truth is, the awareness of our wrongs has already made us better than who we were, and now we have the responsibility to step forward as this new person.

■ Moving On - A Choice We Have To Make 

The reason we cling to the torment of guilt is often to punish ourselves in proportion to the damage we caused, especially when our actions cost someone else dearly.

Here, we feel that by continuing to suffer we compensate for our wrongdoings, showing our remorse, but for how long?

The truth is, no one who truly loves us wants us to keep tormenting ourselves for mistakes they've seen us deeply regret.

Unless they're just manipulators looking to capitalize on the circumstance, using it to hold us in perpetual emotional bondage.

This is a choice we must make.

To remain in guilt is to forfeit the chance to move forward, to use today to begin taking actions that reflect our changed heart.

After all, it's only by becoming better from our mistakes that we give them any meaning.

■ Today - The Chance To Make It Right 

The fact that we've made the choice to move forward with our lives, doesn't mean that all our guilt will disappear over night.

It just means that we've accepted the journey to recovery and this acknowledgement is the first step.

Ideally, the road to recovery unfolds gradually, as some burdens are profoundly heavy and deeply personal, others we've carried for years, and the rest we still suffer from their consequences.

This makes the expectation of a quick fix unrealistic.

Therefore, to recover from our guilt, we must walk a gradual path that includes:

▪︎ Forgiveness 

If we sabotage ourselves, we can offer self forgiveness whenever we're ready but when some other person is involved we can't detect how they'd react.

We can openly show our remorse but we can't rush people into forgiveness, it takes time.

Also, when they do forgive us, we too must forgive ourselves.

This is the only way we can move forward.

Unforgiveness stirs up guilt making it difficult for us to advance into the healing phase of our journey to recovery.

As it's through forgiveness that we receive the grace to move forward.

▪︎ Healing 

We'd find it difficult to heal if the pain from our suffering is still ongoing, probably because we're still bearing the consequences of our actions.

Here, every time we feel that pain, we blame ourselves again for what we have done.

This is normal.

Yet as a way of healing, we can accept our repercussions as the necessary justice for what we've done.

This acceptance sets us free, so that we can rise above our circumstances even in the midst of them.

▪︎ Restoration 

The first benefit of setting ourselves free from guilt is reconciliation.

When we forgive ourselves, we reconnect with our soul, the path of us that wants to thrive again.

Here, we no longer wish to cling to pain and suffering but seek to invite light into ourselves, clearing away all the darkness.

In the same way, forgiveness and healing restore our damaged relationships as we extend grace to each other in order to move forward.

■ Guilt - The Burden Of Sin

The guilt of sin convinces us we're unworthy of God's love, causing us to turn away.

This shouldn’t be.

God has given us a perfect model to follow in our human relationships, offering us immediate forgiveness instead of blame and mercy instead of judgment.

When He sent his son to die on the cross He offered us forgiveness, healing and restoration on the basis of simply believing in Him.

This is all it takes to set us free from all our guilt.

Summary:

We can't return to the past to change our actions but for it to rob us of the chance to act differently today, is a choice.

We can begin right now.

See you next week.

Master Apprentice.

www.x.com/truekingmaker