- Where We're One
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- Ego: Good Here, Bad There
Introduction:
Welcome my friend,
Here’s a raised glass to the arrival of the weekend!
Indeed, it’s become even more delightful now that you’re part of it.
Each moment we share is truly special, offering us the chance to explore something new, refreshing, or heartwarming.
Which is a feeling that never gets old, making every conversation a cherished occasion to look forward to.
Thank you for choosing to be here, despite the many demands vying for your attention.
Aren’t you just an amazing friend?
Discussion:
Our ego refers to the aspect of ourselves that defines how we view our identity, encompassing our sense of self worth and self respect.
This makes it profoundly important, as it largely shapes our behavior, actions, and the way we carry ourselves.
Consequently, a person’s actions, whether admirable or undesirable, can be influenced by their ego, which is why our discussion today centers on discerning when ego benefits us and how it may hinder us.
■ Ego, Good Here
To have a healthy sense of self is important since it influences our behavior as it concerns the following;
▪︎ Shame
Our ego serves as a guardian of our dignity and honor, motivating us to embody virtues like excellence, honesty, and integrity.
When harnessed positively, it helps us maintain composure in our appearance, speech, and actions.
However, losing our sense of shame can lead to reckless, and unprincipled behavior, as we no longer feel accountable for acting in ways that reflect poorly on us.
This is a bad place to be.
▪︎ Responsibility
Our ego inspires us to take responsibility, fueled by confidence in our ability to effect change.
It calls us to lead with ambition but demands the humility to serve, ensuring we remain grounded in reality and avoid overestimating our abilities.
By doing so, we leverage our skills and resources to uplift the world and those around us, embracing responsibility in proportion to our capacity.
▪︎ Drive
Our ego fuels our pursuit of self development, dissatisfied with a version of ourselves that falls short of our full potential.
Here, it drives us to excel in our endeavors, not to outshine others, but as an expression of self respect and pride, shaping us into a version of ourselves that we're proud of.
When used positively and effectively, our ego makes mediocrity intolerable, compelling us to think, desire, and strive for the highest standards in all that we are and achieve.
▪︎ Productivity
When our ego steers us away from chasing, it pushes us toward the challenging yet rewarding path of creating the value to attract what we seek.
If we reject handouts, then we must be creative and productive, earning what we believe we deserve, through our own efforts.
However, this independence becomes counterproductive if it leads us to shun meaningful help or refuse to ask for support, isolating us to a rigid insistence on doing everything alone.
■ Ego, Bad There
Our ego turns into destructive pride when it drives us to prove ourselves, often leading to poor choices rooted in the need to show off.
This harmful ego manifests in several ways:
▪︎ Lengthens Our Growth Curve
It is challenging to teach someone who believes they already possess the knowledge, as pride becomes an obstacle to learning.
Yet, without embracing new knowledge, a person remains unchanged, stuck in their current state of understanding, skill, and capability, rendering them less beneficial to those around them.
Likewise, when we dismiss valuable insights from others because of their gender, race, age, or similar differences, we reveal our own lack of wisdom.
For a person’s competence is not determined by such characteristics but is gained through dedicated effort and practice
▪︎ Makes Us Repulsive
If we go about acting as though we are superior to others, they will sense it in our behavior and hear it in our words.
Consequently, it won’t be long before they begin to avoid us, unwilling to endure our condescending attitude.
This is how many have cut themselves off from the solutions others could provide, creating a relational divide with their haughty demeanor
▪︎ Affects The Quality Of Our Relationships
Beyond making us repellent, ego pushes us toward superficial, trophy-like relationships devoid of true connection.
Some individuals seek out associations merely to align with their perceived social status, even without shared values to forge deeper bonds.
In such cases, we pursue these relationships solely to inflate our ego and enhance our social standing among those who value such appearances.
This is self sabotage as we miss out on more rewarding connections.
▪︎ Affects Our Finances
When we purchase overpriced goods just to flaunt our wealth, we diminish the true worth of our money.
Pride leads us into the trap of acquiring things we scarcely need, persuaded by others that they’re luxurious and elevate our status.
This pursuit of keeping up with the Joneses has caused many talented and successful individuals to squander their wealth and fall into financial ruin.
■ Ego And Handling Rejection
From my experience in sales, I’ve learned a thing or two about rejection, enough to know it’s unpleasant, especially when we tie our self worth to it.
Yet, it doesn’t have to be this way.
We don’t need to take rejection personally, as if it means that we’re not good enough.
This is how pride takes over, pushing us to act foolishly in response or retaliation.
Most often, rejection simply means we’re not what someone is looking for, and that’s okay.
All we need to do is, keep improving ourselves until we find someone who aligns with us.
It's prideful to feel too superior to be rejected, and it's this mindset that leads us to go to unimaginable lengths to prove we’re worthy.
Yet, most times, it’s simply not worth the effort.
■ Ego And Impatience
The reason we want instant results is that our ego seeks immediate gratification.
We want to swiftly prove our success to silence doubters and earn the praise we so desperately crave.
However, life doesn’t work that way.
Anything of true value requires time and effort to build, with challenges that shape us along the way.
Through this process, we confront and overcome obstacles that humble us, transforming our arrogance into gratitude for what we’ve achieved.
This shift in perspective is crucial, as it enables us to empathize with and support others who are still struggling, rather than belittling them for not measuring up.
■ Man's Biggest Folly
Man's ultimate folly, is to assume that he knows more than the God that created him.
Such pride comes at a steep price.
When we reject God, His ways and His will for our lives, what we're saying is that we know how to do it better.
Yet, have we ever been more wrong?
Money, fame and accomplishments can form a mask that makes us seemingly have it all in the eyes of the world, but when we're alone we know this is untrue.
God has left a void in each of us which Him alone can fill and without Him, we'd never really feel fulfilled regardless of our achievements.
When we come to God, laying everything else at His feet, we acknowledge that every of our ability has come from Him.
This surrender is what gives Him the freewill to take absolute control of our lives, using us as masterpieces to bring glory to His name.
Summary:
Two men once engaged in a fierce dispute that escalated into a physical fight.
As it unfolded, bystanders rushed in to intervene, urging them to resolve their conflict.
However, the bigger man was too enraged that the other man had the audacity to confront him, that he was really determined to make him pay.
“How dare you?”
So he grabbed a piece of wood from the corner and struck him so hard that the man died on the spot.
Point made, now what?
Master Apprentice.